At the time, my life was a train wreck. I was in the throes of wrestling with the grief of my son’s suicide, questioning my
Category: Personal Essay
My First Studio Shoot
I’d been in search of an opportunity to dip my inexperienced toes into the world of studio portrait photography.
Pinole Bay
It was a gray-ish day. I’d only ever driven through the town of Pinole. There didn’t seem to be much to attract outsiders: a few
Connection
[PHOTO ABOVE: Contact sheet of photos taken by author at Lake Winnepesaukee, New Hampshire, circa 1978] The moment I printed my first photograph, I was
To The Parents Embarking On Their Journey Into Grief
Recently, someone asked me how grieving my son is different now (four and a half years later) than it was during the first year he
Lists
Have you ever noticed how everything has been reduced to a list? 5 Reasons To Give Up Gluten. 10 Ways To Improve Your Sex Life.
Pay Attention
I awoke from a dream recently. This is significant because I rarely recall the content of my dreams, or even that I dreamed. This has
The Blame Game
I have recently learned of another mother, someone I don’t even know, who is putting herself through the hell of self-blame and guilt as the
Rose-Colored Glasses
I find myself saying things that previously I would have thought were complete bullshit. That bad things don’t happen to us; they happen for us…
With Apologies & Thanks To The Beatles
[AUTHOR’S NOTE: After the initial madness of losing my son to suicide had settled down to a quiet roar, I was drawn to mindfulness meditation.
How To Answer The Question
“Do you have children?” It’s kind of personal, even intimate, isn’t it? These days there are so many who choose to not have children at all, or people who struggle to have children, or people who have suffered the loss of a child. Can’t we lean into conversation with a new acquaintance with a little more imagination and elegance?
Diary Of A Mother In Postpartum Hell
[Author’s Note: I experienced horrible postpartum depression during Julian’s first months of life and my first months as a mother. No one can say for
"A NEW NORMAL" by Celenia Delsol (c) 2022 