I am a Life Coach. I typically coach clients who experienced life-altering loss(es) some time in the past, and are now ready to re-engage with life. I have an M.A. in Counseling Psychology, and I am also a Grief Recovery Specialist.
[If you have recently experienced a loss and are struggling with the immediate aftermath of that loss, please go to my Grief Counseling page.]
Allow me to tell you my story of loss, grief and re-engagement with life:
On June 1, 2010 at 2:34 p.m. I learned my 20-year old son, my only child, had died by suicide. This was not a matter of the rug being pulled out from underneath me. This was the ground beneath me ceasing to exist. One moment the world made sense. The very next, nothing did. Nothing. Not even continuing my own life.
Many years have passed, and I think of and miss my son every single day of my life. People ask me how I’ve managed. They can’t imagine a worse thing happening to a parent. But I’ve gone from being a mother whose heart was ripped from her…to being a woman who functions, contributes, leads a life with purpose, and is a relatively happy human!
During the initial years after my son’s death, I was often asked if my life was “getting back to normal.” I’d cringe every time I heard that phrase: back to normal, as if that was even possible. Did people not understand what I’d lost and how nothing would ever be the same?
The truth is, there was something that I didn’t understand: that “normal” is a moving target, that what we deem “normal” changes as life unfolds. One day I realized I wanted to explore the possibility of my New Normal, because I could not bear one more day of hideous pain defining my life. “Enough already,” my Inner Self gently whispered.
I’m living proof there IS life after loss. Even traumatic, tragic loss. And trust me; I’m no one special. Re-engaging with life after loss is possible for everyone, for anyone!
How did I go from wanting to end my own life after my son died, to wanting to survive and thrive?
- I made a very conscious choice to live the rest of my life;
- I gradually let go of this belief: that my son’s death meant my life was permanently and irrevocably destroyed;
- I asked for and got support, advice, and guidance from others;
- I found people who would hold me accountable; and
- I took action.
Loss comes in all shapes and sizes. Chances are, if you’re human, you’ve experienced something on this list:
- the death of a loved one (a child, spouse, parent, even a pet!);
- an illness that is either terminal or life-altering;
- the destruction of one’s home (fire, earthquake, flood);
- the scarring (physical/emotional/mental) of combat;
- the loss of one’s livelihood, job, career;
- a miscarriage;
- dealing with infertility;
- the loss of a meaningful relationship due to a breakup or divorce;
- and so many others.
GRIEF is the normal and natural response to loss of any kind. But taking up permanent residency in grief does not have to be the end of your story.
If you are ready to:
- imagine your “New Normal”,
- take steps towards that “New Normal”, and
- live in the present, rather than bemoaning the past or worrying about the future…
I would be honored to be your coach, to listen with my heart, to support and encourage you, to brainstorm with you, and to hold you accountable to the action required to get on with the rest of your joyful and wondrous life.
We can work face-to-face if you’re local, or online via Zoom. [During the coronavirus, all sessions are conducted online.] I offer a free 30-minute consultation. Contact me at: firstname.lastname@example.org.