I would have liked… to know your 28-year old self, to give you a hard time about not blessing me with grandhildren (or blessing me
Category: death of a child
What Is My “Why?”
What is my “Why?” In other words, why do I bother to bare my soul in these blog posts? What does it matter? Who cares?
I Remember You
I don’t remember what your favorite color was. I don’t know that I ever knew. But I do remember the day we shared raspberry popsicles that
A New Normal
You may have noticed the new banner on my blog, “A NEW NORMAL.” It occurred to me, after writing for several years about losing my
The Weight Of Loss
It starts at the feet. The gravitational pull is suddenly that of a larger planet. Let’s say: Jupiter. To move, even just a little, takes
An (Un)Easy Solution
I remember the call from my son’s therapist. Julian had recently turned 19, and had been in residential psychiatric treatment for a month. His therapist
To The Parents Embarking On Their Journey Into Grief
Recently, someone asked me how grieving my son is different now (four and a half years later) than it was during the first year he
The Urn Speaks
Hey Mom, I’m not actually in here. You know that, right? But I get it. I get that the living need reminders and touchstones. I
Pay Attention
I awoke from a dream recently. This is significant because I rarely recall the content of my dreams, or even that I dreamed. This has
There But For The Grace Of God
[Author’s Note: At my son’s memorial service, his friend Nadine (not her real name) told the story of how Julian once took a homeless man
How To Answer The Question
“Do you have children?” It’s kind of personal, even intimate, isn’t it? These days there are so many who choose to not have children at all, or people who struggle to have children, or people who have suffered the loss of a child. Can’t we lean into conversation with a new acquaintance with a little more imagination and elegance?
Not “Heartbroken”
[Author’s Note: When a loved one dies by suicide – in my case, my only child – there really isn’t a word that touches the
"A NEW NORMAL" by Celenia Delsol (c) 2022 